(>-.-)> Kirby: zZzZz...

[ ☼] T.V: Oh, but hun, you... you can't leave me...

[ ☼] T.V: I'm sorry, darling, but I already have... I'm actually being projected here by a hologram emitter.

[ ☼] T.V: Frank!! No!!! WHY!?!?!

[ ☼] T.V: Because... because that's just how hologram emitters work.

[ ☼] T.V: Frank... how could you betray me like this?

[ ☼] T.V: It was easier than you think, darling...

[ ☼] T.V: Oh, Frank... you really don't love me!

[ ☼] T.V: You're right Louise, I don't love you, I really love your left ear...

[ ☼] T.V: No... No... I suspected it all along...

[ ☼] T.V: That's why I had it removed, so I can marry it.

[ ☼] T.V: NOOoO1O!o!1!o1one!eone!eone11

(>O.O)> Kirby: Blaaaah!! T.V... too loud!

(>`.`)>[] *Click*

[ ☼] T.V: Welcome to the court room of judge Jude Schindler!

(>`o`)> Kirby: Oh, one of those reality court cases!

[ ☼] T.V: All parties may rise.  Now sit your asses down.

[ ☼] T.V: Your honor, my husband's been-

[ ☼] T.V: Did I say you could speak you little rat?  NO - I DIDN'T!

[ ☼] T.V: But... but... but...

[ ☼] T.V: That's it, court dismissed, ruling in favor for the plantiff for two dollars...

[ ☼] T.V: Yes, now I'll finally be able to afford that new mansion in California!

(>O.o)> Kirby: Wow... being a part of the legal system must be tough...

(>`.`)> Kirby: Hey, John, wake up!

`.` John: Mumble... mumble... Kirby... what are you doing in my room?

(>`.`)> Kirby: I was just watching television downstairs and-

`.` John: Wait, what are you doing in my house in the first place?

(>`.`)>

`.` John: ...

(>`.`)> Kirby: So then Judge Jude Schindler came on, and I was wondering, about how much do judges make?

`.` John: Well, first you start out as a lawyer, which makes a lot of money if you're successful.

(>`o`)> Kirby: You mean like... like one of those people that solves crimes?

`.` John: Similar... its not exactly a detective... Kirby??  Where the hell'd he go?

(>`.`)> Kirby: Hello?  I want to become a lawyer.

O.O Oracle: I AM A LEGAL TEACHER, DO YOU WISH TO ENTER PRE-LAW TRAINING?

(>`.`)> Kirby: No, I wanna skip to the ADVANCED courses.

O.O Oracle: THEN YOU SHALL KILL YOUR FATHER AND MARRY YOUR MOTHER.

(>`.`)> Kirby: ...hmm... I don't think that's possible, but let's say I did anyway.

O.O Oracle: THE GREAT ORACLE HAS SPOKEN!

(>`.`)> Kirby: Okay, when do we start?

O.O Oracle: I SAID THE GREAT ORACLE HAS SPOKEN!!!!

(>`.`)> Kirby: Just give me my f*ing legal degree.

O.O Oracle: OKAY.

(>^_^)> Kirby: I'm a lawyer now!  Time for my first case.

7.7 Man: Help.  Help.  I'm being falsely accused of murder.

(>`.`)> Kirby: I can help you - I'm a lawyer!

7.7 Man: Here is two million dollars, a hand gun, a bloody knife, a blood soaked shirt, the bill for a cleaning service to scrub a 'stain' from the carpet, and my garbage with an unusually heavy object in it.  Win me this court case.

(>O.o)> Kirby: ...okay...

*So Kirby goes to court*

(o.o) Waddle Dee: All rise for the honorable judge Semenman.

~~~(:D) Semenman: All parties may be seated, can we have our first case?

(o.o) Waddle Dee: 30-year-old Man has been accused of murdering Bob Schmucklehiemer and is being accused by his wife.  Repre-

~~~(:o) Semenman: Wait, Man's wife or Bob Scmuckle-guy?

(o.o) Waddle Dee: Bob Smucklehiemer.

~~~(:/) Semenman: Wasn't it Shmicklehemroid?

(o.o) Waddle Dee: ...I don't know... anyway - Representing him will be Kirby, a new lawyer, and a representing-

~~~(:o) Semenman: Wait - Kirby is representing Bob Smundlehemroid?

(o.o) Waddle Dee: No, he's representing Man.

~~~(:O) Semenman: OOOOOOOOOH - okay, sorry my fault.

(o.o) Waddle Dee: Representing Bob Fucklehemmer is King Dee Dee Dee.

d.d King Dee Dee Dee: Now well I say, I have one big rhetorical name.

(o.o) Waddle Dee: Okay, now the defense is up first.

(>O.o)> Kirby: NO FAIR - NO FAIR!!!  ITS MY TURN!!!!!!  MINE!!!

~~~(:O) Semenman: Kirby sit your pink fluffy butt down before I overrule something!!

d.d King Dee Dee Dee: As you can see here now right now here over here but not over there, that man definietly killed Bob Funglehezzier, why?  Because look, his watch clearly states the time is 12:39, when, in fact, the actually time is a full one minute and ten seconds faster then that.

7.7 Man: What the hell kind of evidence is that?

~~~(:0) Semenman: OVERRULED!!!

(>`o`)> Kirby: OBJECTION!!!

~~~(:c) Sememan: Damn, I lost...

d.d King Dee Dee Dee: Now, evidence number two states clearly that he was reading Kay Kenyon's Rift - A science fiction book.  I don't know about you folks, but he doesn't look much like a science fiction book reader.

7.7 Man: ...

~~~(:D) Semenman: NO SIGHING OUT OF TURN.

(o.o) Waddle Dee: Please, Semenman, calm yourself, think of what your doctor would say...

~Dream Sequence~

).) Doctor: It is time to check of anus cancer!

~~~(:D)

~End Dream Sequence~

(o.o) Waddle Dee: ... By that blatantly aroused expression I doubt we're on the same page.

~~~(:D)---o <(Drool)

(>`.`)> Kirby: OH NO! EVERYONE LOOK AT THAT WINDOW FOR FIVE SECONDS!!!

(o.o) ~~~(:|) d.d 7.7 *look!*

(>`o`)> [ ] <- Law Book

*Bum bum!*

(>-o-o)> (He's wearing glasses)

(>-o-o)> Kirby: I am Lawyer Kirby!!!

7.7 Man: Where wen't my sherlock holmes book?

~~~(:D) Semenman: That was so pointless.  Does the plantiff rest?

d.d King Dee Dee Dee: zZzZzZz

~~~(:D) Semenman: How about you defense?

(>-o-o)> Kirby: Now, as you can see, my client here is in no way a murderer of Bob Smuckleupilicious.  He is clearly uncapable of killing him, but the real question is what did kill Bob Snugglelicious?

~~~(:O) Semenman: ORDER IN THE COURT - THATS IT - GUARDS HAVE THOSE TWO REMOVED!!!

).) Doctor: NO SEMENMAN, I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME... I THOUGHT YOU CARED...

r.r Dog: Arf Arf Arf!

~~~(:c) Semenman: I do care, I do...

(>-o-o)> Kirby: So therefore my client actually caused emotional harm to Bob Smugglealist, indirectly killing him by making Bob Wucklevuluptious suicidal, thus stabbing himself two hundred times, shooting himself through the head and balls, in that specific order, then proceeding to drown himself in the river.

7.7 Man: You're not a real lawyer are you...

(>-o-o)> Kirby: Not plausable?  That's what they WANT you to think.  More specifically that's what his WIFE wants you to think.  That's right, his wife is the one that did that to him, it has nothing to do with Man over here.

~~~(:O) Semenman: OVERRULED

(>`.`)> Kirby: NO WAY BITCH!

(>`.`)>=============O d.d

*BOOM*

(>`.`)> Kirby: The Defense sits.

d.d

(o.o) Waddle Dee: I think King Dee Dee Dee is dead...

~~~(:D) Semenman: PREPARE THYSELF FOR CONDOMINIONS!

==) Condominion: I AM THE MINION OF THE GREAT CONDOMHEADMAN!!!

(>`.`)> Kirby: OVERRULED!

~~~(:O) Semenman: ORDER IN THE COURT!!11one

`.` John: NEVAAA!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWR!

~~~(:O) Semenman: RULING IN JUDGEMENT FOR THE JURY - FLOGGINGS FOR ALL!

d.d

==) Condominion: Muahahha!! MUAHAHAHAHH!!! YOUR SEMEN IS MINE SEMENMAN!

~~~(:D) Semenman: I SAID ORDER!

(>`.`)> Kirby: KIYAAAAAAAA!

(>`.`)> ===================) 7.7

*Boom*

(o.o) Waddle Dee: That was your client - what the hell!

(>`.`)> Kirby: KAMAKAZIE ATTACK!!!

(O.O)  <(o.o~ ~ ~ Zoom

*BOOM*

(>x.x)> x05

(>`.`)> Kirby: There's exactly five more of where that came from!

(x.x) Waddle Dee: Owe.

~~~(:c) Semenman: THIS COURT HAS FAILED TO SUSPENCE JUSTICE.

J.S Jude Schindler: PREPARE FOR TEH UBER NUCKAGE!!  SUPER PARA-LEGAL TWO!!!

*KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM*

(>x.x)> x04

(>`.`)> Kirby: w00t I live!

~~~(:D) Semenman: I don't think I'm cut out for this court stuff.

(>`.`)> Kirby: That pwned.

J.S Jude Schindler: And that is why the judicial branch is what it is today.

~Meanwhile~

`.` John: ...what the hell... Kirby did watch T.V in my den last night... what is this?  Popcorn... his blanket... his wallet... his drink... his... oh-oh my god!!!  I didn't know Kirby was like that!!!

~Terminus~